The story of no ones life

This is the story of my musical work.  If you dont care about this read it
anyways and then just dont read it again.

sometime before 1992 (i htink i may not put too many dates because its
just sad that i was that old and in that bad of a band)

Burning the Big Jacket: a band with me, zack and jay
-played slide whistle, casio, crisco can(drum) with marking pen(drum
stick) and guitar believed to be tuned to F(but wasnt even close and only
had 3 or 4 strings)
-all four songs were about the letter 'F'
-recorded one tape that i have
-later on got some interments and amps and cris mark
-played song called 'pog' (a rip off of Ministry's two cord 'thieves and
-tape of that is lost

Brotherhood of the Flyers
-me, joel and skip
-named that because joels drunk uncle rob said he would pay us like 50
bucks to put up flyers, this never happened
-one tape of this band, lost (or joel has it)
-band became the Lint Farmers

The Lint Farmers
-me, joel, jay, skip
-i played bass, joel guitar, jay drums, skip sang and broke his guitar
-worst band ever
-played a couple 'shows' (like at lunch time at school in the quad, and at
nathan figones party, and a graduation party at domianas)
-songs like -bite me die, cameras (about supposed cameras put up around
school to monitor crime, skip tryed to shoot them down with a pellet gun,
i dont htink they were actaully cameras), popualtion control (a song that
i didnt have a bass line to, so i would just play quite with a flanger
petal on), ohio well disater
-songs never had changes, parts rarely fit together, we had no knowledge
of music(but we didnt know this)
-worst band ever
-ended when joel moved away
-there have been too many crappy reunions where we play in joels
basement/room quitly

-me(bass), joel(guitar), jay(drums), dillon(guitar)
-different people would sing differnt songs
-a vast improvement over the lint farmers
-tuned and songs kind of fit together
-dillon knew how to play guitar so that helped
-songs like Davey the Loving Machine(about me being good with the ladies) 
and Power and glory(about the wwf tag team, with merc and paul roma) that
i sang; cats ass, use the tolet sung by joel and some more songs that i
cant remember
-never played a real show
-i think adam badawi may have been in the band too on guitar

-me(bass), jay(drums), dillon(guitar), zack (singing)
-kind of a real band (have a song on a comp LP)
-songs had changes in them
-i have lots of tapes of songs
-gave away like 200 tapes free, made shirts, even made a video
-songs like: Macgyver (by me), vitiman song (by dillon), rock Dave
kendall(by zack about 120 minutes on MTV), spirit of vengence (about
\ghost rider comic-the old one), heavenly, trix and 76 and more
-played some shows, didnt get me any chicks
-i quit after a while because the songs werent about funny things anymore
and the rest of the guys were in Unwound and the Wedding Present and
seemed like the band was sounding more like those bands, no more songs
about tv, video games or comics
-Jack replaced me, i htink they played a couple shows after that and ended
-i dont think i ever saw them play with jack

The Four Eyes
-me(bass), Jay(drums, back up singing), Joel(Guitar, singing)
-probably the best band ive been in (kind of sad, eh?)
-put out a 7 inch record (which i have a couple hundred in my closet)
-got me chicks
-probably more of a comedy act than a band
-toured with the bananas (lisa's band) across the US
-a funny no-effort band with songs about tv, video games and comics
-most songs followed the 'nerd' theme, we would all wear glasses and suits
when we played, sometimes we would wear homemade comic super hero suits
-i dont think i'd ever drop out of this band
-have played in a year or 2 because joel moved to LA (i guess he hates it
down there and said he would move to sacto if someone found a warehouse he
could live in)

Other Projects
-i almost replaced dave smith in NoKillI when he moved to SF, but it didnt
-Ice Bucket Heads, played a show at the S st house with the lil bunnies, i
remember going to that show on the trike i had carring an amp in the
-played in three halloween loft shows (Devo, Iron Butterfly, GG Allen and
murder junkies)
-currently trying to start McBand (songs about mcdonalds) and maybe the
Dead Kenny Gs
-I really just want to be in a band so i can wear my east german border
guard suit