From: donna l poole 
Subject: truth in urban legends,and other tales

we've all heard the story about richard gere and the gerbil, but it's
always someone who knew someone's brother who was friends of the janitor
blah, blah, blah third and fourth-generation gossip, so nobody really
believes it. well, today i talked to someone who has first-hand knowledge.
dr. x's wife worked in the emergency room that night that richard was
treated. she actually was his nurse and treated him in er before he was
taken to the or for removal of the pesky critter. she swears that it really
truly positively happened, so now i put a little more stock in those
stories, even the one about the guy who woke up in the mirage hotel in las
vegas with his kidneys stolen.

this here is a factual story. some guy, after a fight with his boyfriend,
takes the train to san francisco for what is called a castration fantasy
weekend. the castration is quite real-i guess this club specializes-and our
hero is on his way back to miami when he must leave the train in our fair
town because he is bleeding profusely all over his train seat. he is
brought to the hospital where the bleeding and infection are treated and a
skin graft placed over the blank space where his testicles used to be. he
was pretty happy because his boyfriend showed up for a reconciliation and
paid for a plane ticket home. and hell, he didn't need those balls anyway.

we are seeing more and more cases of venereal wards and herpes in
colostomies. one couple were actually caught doing the deed with the wife's
new colostomy the same day we revised it. one guy likes this new hole so
much he has elected to keep it although it is no longer medically

i have to stop now. i'm even makling myself sick.