From jeffd@quincyeng.com Wed Jan 20 12:22:53 1999 Date: Mon, 18 Jan 1999 08:19:25 -0800 (PST) From: Jeff Downing To: "Dave (Ninja) Branum" Subject: here post this

Dave, here post this dumb story about a day of a dumb teenage cheese eating high school kid.

It is easier than writing something yourself....

Well I am just sittin at the comp. listening to Punk Side Story, such a lovely album, and before that Sewer Trout(Sewer Trout Rocks!). Last weekend I was driving my mom around in my car and I actually got away w/listening to Schlong, Elmer, Lizards, and Sewer Trout. Usually she complains when I put anything along those lines on, dam old people. Ohh that was mean, bite my tounge, bite my tounge, unnnhhh, owww.

So you want a story ehh. Well I'll tell you the exciting story of my day at school.

My day started off with my alarm clock blarin' loud set at 5:20. That isn't my usual time I get up, I had some unfinished homework. Also it was really 5:10 because all the clocks in my room are 10 min. fast, don't ask me why, I just like it that way.

I wake up knowing exactly what I had to do. I turned off my alarm clock, by the way the music blarin' was classical since the station was set at 88.9 KXJZ, jazz and informational radio. I lay back down trying to figure out in my mind how am I going to do my homework which was for Biology, 4 drawings and copying down every thing on the page. I figured out how I would do it, but then came the hard part, getting up and actually doing it. I fall asleep, leaving my memory of the morning a blur. Funny how the night before I knew exactly what would happen and the fact I thought that maybe, just maybe I would be wrong for once.

I wake up, 6:40(6:30) fuck fuck, I fell asleep, I knew it. Now I had to get up and get ready for school and eat breakfast, it is the most important meal of the day you know. I had to pack up my work knowing that I would spend the day trying to finish it all in my classes, at least my biology class is my last period.

Walking to the lightrail station, my dad was in Monterey so I couldn't get a ride. But what about my mom you ask, well she takes so long to get ready, all that makeup and shit, at least I don't mind walking. I round the corner in front of the station and feeling a little nervous hearing a trams bells, but I see it isn't mine, just the one going the opposite direction. Feeling relieve I see my train go by. Fuck fuck. I just knew it was gonna be a bad day.

I find a place that looked dry and set down my pac and pull out my Biology book and drawings. I start to copy down a page, the only one I had left to copy, leaving just coloring to do. I was the only one there, but slowly the people came, mostly ghetto foo's. I was keeping an eye out for the train, so I wouldn't be in a hurry to get on. Hmmm, what is that sound? Fuck, it was the train. I stuff my shit in my bag, shove my drawings into my book, and zip up my pac. I move quickly to the last car, my pac on one shoulder, my book in my left hand. I get on, relieved somewhat. I move to the middle of the train and sit on the floor. Pull my drawings out of the book and notice that they are a little folded, I just shrug my soulders. I don't care and neither will the teacher. I continue copying the page.

I get off the train, everything in my bag. I walk to 19th hoping to catch a bus, though I know I won't since I was on the second train. I knew I had to walk, at least I knew I would get to school on time and the walk is a strait shot along 19th. Though feeling out of luck, I catch all the lights, didn't even have to stop and wait.

Arriving at school, I go strait to my locker. Throw my pack in and pull off my top sweater, all that walking made me hot. I later found when dressing for P.E. it was hot enough to make me sweat which I found on my t-shirt, led me to think, hmmm, when was the last time I washed this. I go into the gym, sit in the bleatures with my greco italiano friend who is telling me about how he can't wait to switch p.e. teachers since he hates the one we have. We refer to him as g.g., standing for Gay Glaviano. Nothing much happens, just some exercises, running, then play basketball. Everyday I play with this asian guy, Hau, my greco friend, and this guy we refer to as mexican, but not to his face.

2nd period rolls around. Spanish 2. I try to work on my biology, but we have presentations so I didn't have much time. Noting interesting happens. The presentations are stories we wrote in groups. I played an amigo and a muy bonita chica(very beautiful chick), I didn't have to do anything out of the ordinary though.

3rd period. World cultures, HISP. Finally start coloring the drawings, when a fellow classmate informs me that my biology teacher will give us time to work on them. I think, should I finish then. Hmmm, I figure I would have to work fast and it would be hard to do. I continue with my work while the class finishes a video on south american illegal aliens trying to cross the border. I keep the thought that I need to finish my coloring befor 5th period since I have a test and won't have time to color.

4th period. English, HISP. Unfortunetly I sit in front of my row and in this class some of the people are doing presentations about their mid-term. I only got to work on the drawings for a bit, didn't want to be rude to the speakers. After each speaker we write a short evaluation on the persons presentations. I just give everyone the same thing. Good volume, good or more eye contact, alot of info. I'm sure my comments will help these people with their future presentations, and with that in mind, I feel satisfaction.

Ahhh, lunch. I converse with cason. We sit and begin to eat. I quickly finish my lunch to finish my coloring. I start working on my coloring of a snake and cason grabs it and looks at it asking "what are these for?" I answering "take a guess". cason figured it out in one guess. I shove my other drawings in his face and take back the snake drawing to finish it. Cason comments on how crappy my drawing of a Siberian tiger is. Personally, I didn't give a fuck.

5th period, Geometry. I continue working on my coloring, the teacher passes out the tests and I get out my necessary equipment for the test, pencil, erasor, and calculator. I get through the test quickly and check it over twice to make sure I wasn't missing a page. I was surprised to be the first person to finish, it was odd. After placing my test on the overhead I found the reason I was the first person to turn in the test, the other dumasses didn't know where to put the test, they waited for someone else to. I return to my coloring, finally on last one, almost done.

6th period, Biology. As soon as I get in the class I finish up my coloring, the teacher tells the class we have 10 min. to work on drawings. I finish quickly and staple them together. Then we got to watch an exciting film strip on ecosystems. I only remember bits of the film since I was falling asleep but trying to stay awake, or at least look like I was watching the film.

I walk down to the bus stop, there is no bench though. It was slowly broken and torn apart until it was finally taken away. In its place I sat on the concrete. I waited, and waited, then waited some more. Eventually some gangsta foo' from my school came up, followed by some midget chick. Finally the bus came.

A few minutes after getting on the bus I got off at the light rail station. When I was only a quarter of a way from the station, the train came. All of the people ran after the train, I didn't, I never do, just don't like to or care. I was about 150 feet away from the train when it departed. I sat in my usual place on the concrete near the last car. It was weird cause I was the only person there. I reclined on my pack and looked at the sky. Sang parts of songs by Sewer Trout. Two juvenile kids came round the corner on their bikes, they were about 10. Noticing me one of them commented I was lazy. Not to long after that I heard one of them say, "hey lets mess with him." This led to them riding toward, one of them aiming strait for me yelling, "you better watch out, I'm gonna run into you." I tilted my head back watching his bike roll rapidly my way and swerve braking. I jumped into a position half sitting, half laying, to avoid the bike as the kid swerved round me, stopping parallel to me, laughing. I just smiled and said, "you tryin to mess with me." He answered, "I just wanted to see if you'd get scared or not." With that, they rode off and the train came. I got myself up and boarded the rear car, sitting in the same spot I did in the morning. Looking back upon the day, it wasn't really a bad day, just not a good one.

There is my exciting story for your enjoyment. I saw deliverance, good movie, the characters were familiar.

Date: Thu, 21 Jan 1999 07:38:55 -0800 (PST)
From: Jeff Downing 
To: sac15856@saclink.csus.edu
Subject: that story

that story i sent you was by Parks, he goes to McClatchy, and 
loves it there.

They call him shlong boy, i think to make him feel good despite 
being a
midget.  Something to do with the thought of having an appendage 
big enough
to become your nick name is heart warming to him, despite it 
being an
obvious lie.

So could you give him credit, i just sent the dumb story.
										 Shlong 
Boy